Happy Holidays!

Once again, we got out our satiny caftan loungers, wig collection, and squid hat, and shot our annual holiday card. The photo shoot involves a lot of yelling by Mama and Dada about staying on our marks (whatever that means), looking “over here,” and smiling, so much smiling.

ff front

You try smiling while someone maniacally yells, “Smile!”

Here’s the back of the card:

ff back

And as promised, here are the answers to, “What’s the one thing you should never do over the holidays?”:

We don’t know what they’re talking about with the crying.

Happy (belated) Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Happy Oma’s Birthday, Happy New Year!

– Bert & Duke

Bert & Duke: 2013 The Year in Review


2013 was a pretty good year. Bert turned 4 with a bouncy house gala and Duke turned 2 in seersucker no less. Here are some of the highlights:

• We survived Hurricane Nemo in February! Bert thought it was fun; Duke did not.

• Also in February, the groundbreaking Ask Hazy Show premiered. Viewers have called it “cute” and “hilarious”, and frankly, are somewhat patronizing. (There are now 11 episodes!)

• Of course, then Duke tried to copy me with the Ask George show, which debuted to dismal ratings. [Duke’s note: we never gave it a chance to catch on with fans!]

• We realized we’re best friends!

• Duke revealed he’s got made skills with the sticks.

• We had our first Very Special Episode of the Ask Hazy show for my friend Sienna.

• We taught kids everywhere how to make life more interesting for their parents. You’re welcome, parents.

• We realized that with our modeling skills, we shouldn’t be getting out of bed for anything less than $10,000 or at least, like, 10 M&M’s.

• We gave some tips for cheering up Miss Dussia-Elliot or people with simpler names.

• We taught a class on dominating musica class.

• Everyone learned, don’t take Bert’s fork.

• We celebrated the best dad (around). Spoiler alert: it’s ours.

• We mourned the loss of a friend fart cushion.

• Bert reminisced to a simpler time, before Duke (!).

• Bert reached semi-international fame, thanks to mommyshorts.

• Duke tried (and failed) with another show. [Duke’s note: Come on!]

• We had a special guest star on the show. And by “the show”, obviously we mean Ask Hazy. [Duke’s note: no, we don’t!]

• Duke explained the deal with the bibs.

• Something beyond horrible happened to Bert.

Santa came! He failed to bring Halloween shoes or a real robot though.

Happy New Year!

– Bert & Duke