The Rules



Before we went to our dear friend Lynnie’s for Memorial Day weekend, Mama had us review The Rules for visiting people. Here they are for your reference:

If you don’t feel like watching the video, this about sums them up:
No crying
No running
No punching
No kicking
No hitting
Use our words, like Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, please and thank you
No whining
Seriously no punching
And for real, no running
Do good sleeping in our beds (or don’t)

– Bert & Duke

Update: We did not follow all the rules, but we were pretty good about no punching. So there’s that.

Quick Chat


Here is what seems like an incoherent string of thoughts about Little Mermaid characters and the greatest book of all time, Little Pigeons, but would be probably called cinematic genius if I told you Nicolas Winding Refn directed it. Regardless, you should probably watch this. Stay tuned to find out who’s going to see fireworks (me!) and who should go down to the toy pit (Dada!). Oops, spoiler alerts.
– Duke

Ask Hazy Episode 10: Astrophysics


In which I answer a question from Nikolina S, future famous astrophysicist, “Should we try to detect or create dark matter?”. Well, we already know Duke’s answer, which is “no, thank you”, which he yells 300 times during this video.
Here are some things we were able to edit from this video:
– Mama attempting to answer “What side is each?” which is how I ask what the pros and cons of each are. Mama is about as much of an astrophysicist as I am. The only reason she passed Physics class in college is due to a kindly nerd named Ronald, and the closest thing she took to Astrophysics is a class in college nicknamed “Stars”, where she did the crossword. Sorry, Oma & Opa.
– Gross banana eating noises. You’re welcome.
– Duke yelling, “No, thank you!” a bajillion more times. Duke yelling, “Mama!!” because he’s not getting all the attention. I’m the one with a TV show, thank you very much, Duke.
– The break we took from discussing dark matter to put that rose in my hair. Cute, right?

Anyway, I think we can all learn something from this video. Like, hey, maybe clean your kitchen sometime, Mama & Dada.

– Bert

“That Way: Cooking with Duke”


Guys, Hazelbert isn’t the only one with a TV show. Here’s the first (and let’s face it, probably only) episode of “That Way: Cooking With Duke”. Today, we’re cooking breakfast dishes. But wait ’til you see what comes out of the oven at the end! (Spoiler alert: I don’t know how spoiler alerts work.)
– Duke
p.s. Is it unappealing that the set has a giant trash can in the background?

Ask Hazy: Episode 6, “Boys”


Kelly E and I both like fashion, boys, and sticking out our tongues in photos, so I guess I’m cool with her saying we’re Best Friends.
This week on the show, she asks, “How do I know if a boy really likes me?” Cher says it’s in his kiss, Whitney says don’t trust your feeling. Here’s my take.
Spoiler alert: I’m 3 1/2.